Category Archives: God

Speak Like a Leader

church_leaders_lead

Last week, I shared three ideas with our staff on leadership in the church.  Over the next few days, I thought I’d share them on here as well.  I’d love to hear your thoughts on them!

Speak Like a Leader

Often, as leaders in the church, we reach deep into our toolboxes to help motivate people to give their time, energy, prayer, and talents to ministry.  Without a paycheck, as we discussed in previous posts, we don’t have as easy leverage as employers have with employees.

One of the things we can lean into is a relational pull.  We genuinely love the people in our ministries, and we recruit people to serve sometimes by getting them to engage with us and like us, and pull them in.  At a base level, it’s great to serve with people you like.  It makes for stronger teams.

But, if that is our primary draw, we set people up for failure.  When they come in to serve, thinking that it’s a stepping stone to a deep relationship with this leader, we let them down.  Anyone with a team of five or more volunteers will quickly find out they can’t be best friends with everyone on their team.  The person agreed to serve as a sound tech, a small group leader, a 4th grade teacher, a greeter primarily to get closer to us and build a deep friendship.  We really want them to serve, and when we need someone else, we have to move on to the next person, recruiting them in the same way.  This leaves the first person disappointed and disallusioned with us.

Or, maybe you don’t have this issue, at least not at this level.  But many of us as pastor’s foster this idea by how we speak to team members.  When we soften our conversations with them by using buddy language, we can inadvertently lead them to the same conclusion as above.  By no means am I advocating being impersonal, but be aware of how you speak to your volunteers.  If you find yourself making a mess everytime you have to correct or coach a volunteer, some of it may be the miscues in your language.

If we recruit people to a role that is gift based, with a clear set of values for service, then when the relationship grows at any level, it based on mutual love and respect and is a bonus.  The role is the foundation.  When we shift that to the relationship being the foundation; then correction, coaching, or changes cause emotional loss in our volunteers.  If we use language that confuses our team on where they stand, it subtly makes things worse.

So, learn to speak like a leader.  Be a loving, caring, Jesus centered leader.  But speak like a leader.  Be their friend.  But speak from the seat of a leader.  Don’t manipulate your team by acting like their buddy when you aren’t going to actually be their buddy.

A good litmus test is this:  if they leave your ministry, will you change your schedule to continue to spend as much time with them as you do now?  If not, then you are primarily their leader.  Act, speak, communicate like their leader.  It is a more honest way of treating them than setting them up for emotional let down.

What do you think?  How have you done this well?  Where have you made these mistakes?  I’d love to hear.

People Pleasing Doesn’t Equal Love

church_leaders_lead

Last week, I shared three ideas with our staff on leadership in the church.  Over the next few days, I thought I’d share them on here as well.  I’d love to hear your thoughts on them!

People Pleasing Does Not Equal Love

In the last post, we looked at recruiting people into all sorts of different roles.  Part of that challenge is to get past our desire to serve people and see them be happy.  That raises it’s head even bigger in this issue.

So many of us develop a fear that if someone rejects a program, an idea, our congregation, or even us, then they are rejecting Jesus.  Our next thought, often unspoken, is that if our actions lead them to reject Jesus, then Jesus will be upset with us, and have to fix the mess we’ve made.  Therefore, I need to do everything in my power to be sure than people never reject anything I do, or anything that is done at any level in my ministry.

That’s just ugly.

When we try to keep everyone happy, we’ve fallen into pleasing people.  It won’t be long till we have to quit listening to Jesus somewhere in our ministry, in order to keep people happy.  At this point, we have come full circle, to where we actively ignore Jesus so that He won’t be disappointed in us for upsetting people.  Yep, its that confusing, and that screwed up.

Let’s take the whole theory apart.  If someone rejects Jesus, that is between them and Him, not them, us, and Him.  He doesn’t hold us accountable for their decision.  Secondly, rejecting your idea to paint the 3 year olds room is NOT the same as rejecting Jesus.  Someone leaving your church because they want “deep teaching” and the church across town is doing a series on Revelation is NOT the same as rejecting Jesus.  Having that mom tell you her kid will not be coming back to youth group because she doesn’t want her wholesome son around “those” kids in your ministry is NOT the same as her or her kid rejecting Jesus.  That fear is a lie.  It has much, much more with our own insecurities and our personal need to be liked than it does with any need Jesus has to be liked.  Honestly, it’s sinful.

So, when we make decisions, and tell ourselves that by letting that person go, by giving in, by letting them hold the church or ministry or you hostage emotionally, that we are “loving them” and “modeling a servant’s heart”, we need to stop and really examine it.  Are we really doing that because it’s best for the other person and for the church, or because we just can’t handle being rejected and thought of as a failure one more time?

The fear that drives a people pleasing lifestyle is not a servant’s heart.  It is not love.  It is simply a fear.  Fear like that doesn’t come from God.  Love the person, serve them by speaking the truth, and calling them to grow and become more like Christ.  Too often, we try to pick up Jesus and go to where the person is.  They need to get up and move towards Jesus.

This week, understand that pleasing people does not, in any way shape or form, equal love.  Love is honest, truthful, faithful, obedient, wants the best for others, and points everyone to move towards Jesus.

Is there someone you feel a fearful desire to keep happy?  What is Jesus calling you to instead?  I’d love to hear your thoughts.

God Uses the Craziest People to Do Amazing Things

Magi Cartoon

 

Here I am on Good Friday, the day the ordeal begins for Jesus, and in my reading for the day, I’m in Matthew 2, the story of the Magi coming to visit him.  I had never thought much about God’s interaction with the Magi in this story.  They’ve always been characters of convenience, men who show up, deliver some gifts, and disappear.  But there is much more going on in the story than that, obviously.

They come because the star of the King appears.  At the time of Jesus birth.  These guys are astronomers, and they believe in astrology.  God meets them where they are.  In their whole story in Matthew 2, the Magi never speak of God or of seeking for God.  They saw a star, it pointed to a new king, and they came to worship a new king.  A human king.  They believed the stars led them to a man worthy of worship.  They are far from God in their story, in their search.  They are diligently chasing the wrong thing, with all of their might, and God meets them in their broken beliefs, and still draws them to Jesus.

As I read this, and was trying to figure out how to apply this story, I realized that I often believe, even though I know better, that God only works in people in one way.  I know it’s not true, but I default back to that so often.  If a person isn’t coming to Jesus directly, through a church and a pastor, then not much is happening.  But that is not true.  These guys are chasing a star to a human king.  In doing so, God introduces them to Jesus, and uses them to provide for Mary and Joseph.  The Magi bring the gifts that fund the flight to Egypt.  They are of a different religion, a different belief system, and God blesses them.

Herod is partly Jewish, and knows the places to seek truth in the Scriptures, and yet He misses it all.

God simply does not work the way I work.  I have to hold fast to truth, and be willing to take hits for my beliefs, and AT THE SAME TIME make a lot more room for God to work in people who disagree with me in every way.  This is such a challenge, but it is what God is calling us to.  If He can use the Magi, and work in their hearts, He can and will use and work in anyone.  My default methods don’t hem God in.

So, this Easter, how is God working around us, who is He working in and through, that we are quick to dismiss?  Where is He moving, and we are refusing to believe it, because it doesn’t fit in our values or methods?  I hope that we can model a firm commitment to an unchanging truth while we follow a God who specializes in unorthodox methods.

Christ is risen.  Do we need more proof than that?

What I’ve Learned the Last Five Months

I haven’t written in a while, and a lot has happened in my time away from posting.  The biggest change has been a move from being the youth pastor at our church to being the executive pastor.  Ok, so I realize you’re probably thinking “Dude, you’re still a pastor at the same church, what’s the big deal?!”  Honestly, you’re right, it’s not a big deal to anyone except me.  Here’s how it has affected me.

I’ve worked with middle school and high school students for 20 years.  I love students and families, and watching God work in their hearts is unbelievable.  That doesn’t change, regardless of what my job title is.  Over the past year, I’ve been serving in some other roles at our church, and watched God generously bless those opportunities in ways that were way beyond anything I could ever deserve.  It caught me off guard.  As I spent several months praying and looking for what He was doing, it became clear that if I wanted to move sideways into a new role, God was good with that, and He opened all of the doors for me in that process.  I hate to say that I was “called” to this other role, but I do feel that God made it very available in me, and raised the passion in my heart for working with a wider range of people in the church.  So, I worked through the process of hiring a new youth pastor, and moving over.

It has been exciting and it has been tough.  It’s hard to let go of something that is so much a part of you.  As much as I tried to keep my identity from being  wrapped around my ministry, it still did to a certain level.  Letting go of that identity, and then giving that very identity to someone I didn’t know very well was incredibly emotional, and frightening.  What was waiting for me on the other side?  What if I failed at it all?  What if I didn’t find any joy or happiness after the initial move?  Over and over people have asked me if I was excited, or congratulating me on my promotion.  It didn’t feel that way, and of all the emotions I’ve felt, excitement hasn’t been at the top of the list.  Have you ever been there?  Have you ever had to step out in some area of your life, trust God with something that is intensely personal, and not be sure where you’d land?  Yeah…

Faithful

Here’s what I’m finding; the key is to chase faithfulness, not happiness.  If I constantly chase happiness, I’ll never arrive.  It will always be two steps in front of me, and disappear as soon as I grasp it.  But faithfulness…faithfulness sits down with us right where we are, and holds our hand as we take each tenative step.  Faithfulness is found right here, today, sometimes as we wait, sometimes as we obey and move forward.  As I chase faithfulness, I don’t need to worry.  God tells me when I’m faithful, He will go past happiness and give me peace, joy, and hope.  I don’t create it or earn it.  He just gives it.  Faithfulness is the pathway that leads to where those three are available.

So, today, I sit in a new office, with a different computer, writing from a different chair.  I have a new title, with a different to do list, and someone else is covering all of my old to do’s from my old office.  Am I excited by all of that?  I honestly don’t know.  Sometimes.  Am I excited about what God will show me if I’m faithful.  That one I know.  Yes, I am VERY excited about that one.

Be faithful.  Not to earn anything.  Just be faithful because it’s the best option.  It’s worth it.

(By the way, the new youth pastor is TJ Knowland.  He is a HUGE blessing from God for me, for our students, and for our church.  I am so incredibly impressed with him, and honored that God cares so much about us to bring TJ and his wife Hannah to us.  Wow, God is so good!  Pray for TJ and Hannah in their new role and home here at SCC.)

Temper Tantrums, Heart Issues, and Flying Cell Phones

james1_19

Each week, I’m meeting with one of the senior high guys in our group, and we’re reading the book of James together.  I love James, because its so practical, and hits on so many issues that I deal with, and that so many other people deal with.

Today’s reading covers James 1:19-21 as part of what we are looking at this week.  You’ve likely heard this passage before.  It says:

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, because our anger does not produce the righeousness that God desires.  Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.”

I know these verses well, I memorized them years ago, and have taught them dozens of times.  Knowing about being slow to speak and get angry, it makes perfect sense that yesterday in the car, I got incredibly mad at a conversation I was having, and threw my phone on the floor when I hung up.  All in front of my fourteen year old daughter.

Oh yeah, I’m the world’s best dad, for sure.

So, I apologi
I read these verses, and know the sequence I’m supposed to do.  I need to listen first, and listen for a long time.  I need to stop and measure my words before I speak.  I need to be patient, and not let anger run.  That’s what I need to do.  Sometimes it’s even what I actually do.  Other times….not so much.zed as we pulled up to school to drop her off.  But it had already messed up her morning.  I texted later, and asked for her forgiveness again.  She forgave me, but the damage was done.  I had blown it.  I hate it when I do that.  But I did anyway, and have to own it.

So verse 21 is hitting home.  Right now, I need to keep working to get rid of moral filth in my life.  I need to fight for purity in my thoughts, patience in my actions, humility in my heart, generosity in my possessions, and gratitude in my desires.  So many of those areas are the places I struggle to keep filth out, and because of that I become a person who believes they are being cheated, slighted, ignored, and unjustly accused.  Of course my anger runs the day when I believe and act on those values.  Which leads to me having to apologize…alot.

If you believe James has it right, then it would make sense to ask what is the “filth” that is lying to you, and causing you to react in anger?  What lies are you holding onto that bite you when you’re not looking?  Lust, greed, self-importance, hoping to find joy in other people or things, all of this stuff is just lies.  Lies that lead to a quick temper, a quick tongue, and a very slow ear.

And maybe a broken cell phone.

Jesus’ Last Words and Sticky Faith Prayers

Sticky Faith Prayers

John 17 has Jesus’ last prayer on earth before the crucifixion.  It’s His “last words”, if you will, and I am always fascinated by it.  I’ve noted before how Jesus prays for the 11, talking about how they are the ones He was sent for, and how He delivered all of them to the end.  That amazes me, that Jesus grand plan was primarily for 11 people.  Not quite a mega-church model, in and of itself.

I’ve also written before about how Jesus prays for us, you and me, in the prayer.  He prays for us specifically, and that continues to break me down and remind me of how loved I am.  It was as I was reading that passage of the chapter today, that a new thought hit me.

Jesus says this:  ”20″My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message,21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”  Jesus prays for us, through the disciples.  What I mean is, Jesus prays for the ones He had taught, and then prays for the ones they would teach, generation after generation.

I do ok praying for my students and families.  But what about the people they will teach?  For some reason, it’s hitting me that I don’t pray for them.  My students will have varying level of “success” in growing in their faith.  I’m spending a lot of time right now in the Sticky Faith co-hort discussing it, thinking about it, planning for it, and re-working ministry for it.  But here, in John 17, Jesus prays a sticky prayer, if you will.  He prays for His students, and then prays for their students.  When I consider this, and apply it to my kids, it reminds me of the impact that God is planning down the road.  My investment isn’t just in them.  It’s in men and women I will never meet who they will impact.  It’s in future students who aren’t born yet, that one day my students will grow and pass their faith onto.  This is a side of Sticky Faith that I simply haven’t given much thought to.  I’ve given even less prayer to it.

But Jesus did.

At the end of His life, with the clock ticking, this is what He prays for.  He prays for those He loved and taught, and He prays for the ones they would one day love and teach.  And their spiritual grandchildren, great-grandchildren, all the way down to me.  And you.

It seems that this might be one of the most fundamental elements of Sticky Faith for us to engage in.  If Jesus knew its value, at this time and place, it’s surely worth our daily investment.

The only question is: will we?

I Am a Wanted Man

Pray to be together

I am reading through the prayers of Jesus again today, and I read his amazing prayer in the Garden in John 17.  If you’ve never taken the time to read it, and think about it, I highly encourage you to do it today.  Every time I read through that prayer, it changes me and I understand Jesus just a little bit better.  It is such an open door into how He thought, what was important, and how He wants us to live.  He prays specifically for you in there as well.  I’m not kidding at all, he prays for you.

So, today I’m reading it again, and this is what hit me:

24 ”Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.

It’s the phrase “I want those you have given me to be with me…” that jumped into my soul.  He wants us.  I know Jesus loves me (I mean, the Bible tells me so, right?) but to hear him say it like this, that he wants me to be with Him, is just somehow earth shattering.  He….wants….me.  I don’t know about you, but there is a part of who I am, a part of how I’m wired, that is designed to do nothing other than crave that love, to jump at these words, to push me to tears and joy at hearing him say it.  It’s hardwired in me to need this.

So hearing it today brought that flood of hope to the surface.  He wants me to be with Him.

It’s hard to imagine sweeter words than that.

And He wants you.

He…

Wants…

You…

May it be so today.

Being A Loner for Jesus

prayer

I am reading through a five-day devotional on the Prayers of Jesus.  Most of them are just short verses referencing the fact that He prayed.  Today, one of the verses stood out to me so clearly:

Luke 5:16 But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

I had to go look up the chapter to see what the story was leading up to the verse.  Anytime a verse begins with “But…”, it’s tied to the verses and the story before it.  In this case, Jesus has become famous, people want to hang out with Him, He is healing people and doing amazing ministry, and everything is moving forward at 1000 mile an hour.

BUT he prayed.  In the busyness, success, and running; He prayed.

The third word hit me as well.  But Jesus OFTEN prayed.  He made it a habit.  I am so weak in this area, and I know it.  When I do stop and pray consistently, it changes me.  I can literally feel it.  But Jason doesn’t often pray.  I talk to God all day, but I don’t often stop and pray.  You see, the fourth and sixth words matter greatly here.  He WITHDREW to LONELY places.  He stopped the success, the ministry, the healing, the running, the being in demand, the great things and left it behind to pray.  Often.  Alone.

He quit doing the work of God to be with God.  This is the one I struggle with.  I am with God in the work.  I talk to Him WHILE I’m busy.  But I don’t often, on a regular basis, stop the work to just go away and pray.

So I am, right now.  As soon as I post this, I am leaving my desk to go off and pray.  I have a thousand things to do today, and ALL of them are urgent and important.  That’s why I am walking away.

What about you?

Stand

ephesians 6 10-20

I am reading through Ephesians 6 today, and it’s a fairly common set of verses.  We talk about it, teach on it, make up entire vacation Bible school weeks around it, and sell plastic warrior toys in Christian book stores based on them.  They go like this:

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place,15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

I love Paul’s description and his call for us to be strong and understand we are in a battle.  But each time I read this passage, one word stands out to me … “stand”.  It appears, as a command, four times in the passage.  Stand.  It’s not exactly our understanding of battle, is it.  We like words like Charge!, Attack!, Conquer!, Destroy!  We like the thought of charging hell with a water pistol, kicking butts and taking names, in the name of Jesus.  We want to be little Christian Rambo’s blowing up everything in sight.

But Paul calls for us to stand.  To dress for battle, to arm ourselves, and stand our ground.  Why?

Jesus is the one who attacked.  He won.  He fought the battle, swinging the cross, and He alone conquered.  He is the king, the victor, the winner, the man, the bomb, the One.  He alone is the one with all power, honor, and glory.  He already has won.  The battle is, for all intents and purposes, over.  There are still skirmishes and fights to wage.  So what do we do?

We stand our ground.  Don’t give up anything that Jesus gives us to the enemy in their desperate bids to go down with a fight.  We have to prepare ourselves for the fight, that will come to us.  We need to be ready to stand the attack.  But it is not up to us to defeat the enemy.  Jesus has that one covered.  So, as we put on the helmet of salvation, we will be in battle.  But we don’t need to be afraid, we don’t need to freak out, we don’t need to worry.  We are peacekeepers after the battle is over.

So, what does this mean?  We do have an enemy, and it’s not that person who drives you nuts.  It’s a spiritual army that can’t win.  We don’t need to live in fear as followers of the King.  We don’t need to worry.  We can rise above the mess of the day-to-day lies we live in, and follow a Jesus who is strong, vibrant, alive, and powerful.  When we move closer to Him, we will be attacked, but it’s not something that can overwhelm us, IF we use our armor.  But notice, all of our armor is based on our connection to Jesus.  As soon as we disconnect from Him, we will be overrun, and the enemy will take back ground that is ours to defend.

So, stand strong.  Trust your King, follow His plan today, and live in His strength.  He is a force to be reckoned with.

Just stand.

Hi, My Name Is Jason, and I am a Planner….

Plans

I find it so funny/frustrating/confusing/encouraging how I rarely know what God has planned for me, yet I still spend so much time trying to guess/hope/pray/assume/create/force some type of plans to happen.  I’m hardwired to be a long-term planner, it’s who I am.  And I try to hold those plans with very open hands, knowing God often changes them.  Yet, I find myself once again standing in the middle of a place that I thought was where I needed to be moving in my life, only to see those doors shutting.  I’m not mad, at least I don’t feel mad right now.  I’m just surprised at how quickly I want to make things into my new comfort zone, even when they are mostly shadow and hope.  As I sit here, wondering what the coming weeks and months hold, I am reminded once again, I am fine.  God has me, and I don’t need to be afraid/stressed/worried/unsure.


So often we make plans for ourselves, they give us some sense of comfort.  I don’t think I will ever stop planning/dreaming.  I used to wonder if I was wrong to create plans and systems.  At this point, I know it’s something God has put into me.  I just have to stop hoping vainly that they will bring me peace or comfort.  They won’t.  Only Jesus and His care will.  So, that is where I’m trying to put down my roots today.  In His care, in His comfort, in His goodness.

Maybe you’re a planner.  Maybe your plans have been disrupted.  Maybe you’re mad at Jesus for sticking His nose in your dreams.  Don’t be.  It’s not worth it.  You and I just want comfort.  THAT is one thing He offers to us in buckets.

We can trust Him in that one.  Today.  Tomorrow.  Forever.

Plan on it.